There are circuitous roads we travel in life. If you pause for a second and think back, you may recall some pivotal moments that have led you to where you are today. Yet when those events transpired, the final outcome was still unknown. What we do know, is that everything happens for a reason.

Life Without Mother
Patty Duke's journey illustrates how truly incredible life is. She came from humble beginnings. "My parents were poor," she told me, "but they wouldn't want me to say that. My mother had a depressive personality and my father was a hopeless alcoholic, yet they gave me the basics. They taught me to live by the golden rule, maintain decency and to be honest. I was 6 when that part of my life ended, but as time went by and I became consumed by this show biz thing, I felt a longing to have normalcy restored to my life. I have found that again and am thankful."

Training began for Duke when she was just 6 years old. She began working by the time she was 7. "The whole thing was an accident," she said. "My parents had split and a couple who were involved in the show biz industry approached my mother about my talent. Mom and I were very close, more than very close actually, but they convinced her that they could make me a star and give me everything she couldn't. They said all those things that appeal to someone who has no self-esteem. So she gave me up to live with them. We were living just a few blocks away from each other but it might as well have been Jupiter and Mars. The Ross's became my managers and ruled my life. They were taskmasters and I never saw my mother while I was young. To this day…to this minute, I carry a torch for my mother. Even though we did get back together and spent the last 25 years of her life within arm's reach of each other, that child within me is still longing
for her.

Call me Anna!
"My birth name is Anna and in my private life, across the board, I am called Anna and have been for over 30 years. The Patty came from the managers who thought it would be cuter, but for me, it never took emotionally. I had to finally settle within myself that Patty Duke had established certain credentials and that I'd be silly to throw that away. Yet I'm a person who is big on symbolism and a name is a symbol. So I function as Patty Duke in public and Anna in private."

I was intrigued by the concept of symbolism so I asked Anna to elaborate further. (At this point in our conversation, I felt I had been invited into her private life, so I began addressing her as Anna. It seemed most fitting that I acknowledge her for who she is).

"Certain things evoke an emotional response in me…everything from rosary beads to a white candle burning in the night. My symbols are not identified with a universal meaning. I imbue them with my own meaning and power. If I break it down, the symbols I value in my life become my wishes for peace and the right way to approach living.

Trusting Her Intuition
"I don't have any special systems to sort out the emotions of my life; rather I am instinctive. Some things take me half a second to reconcile, others take me years. My feelings about God, church and religion are still unresolved. For rolling down my eyes within minutes but that doesn't sustain me. I am really looking for a spirituality that my consciousness can grab. Something I can feel devotion toward. I have to admit, I am green with envy for people who are devoted and committed. I have found a few things that help me feel connected to God, especially my husband and I believe God works through him for me. Many times when I am confused, angry or unsettled, I can feel my connection through him. I didn't plan on having an agent be my link to God, but that's how it is.

"In my acting, and throughout the years, I have had what I consider transcendental moments, especially when playing Helen Keller. But even in small parts, there have been lyrical happenings that have taken me to a richer place in my spirit. When I look into the eyes of a newborn infant, I know in my heart, there is a God. They look to me and say; 'I know something you have forgotten.' I can feel the God connection in their purity, innocence and their openness. I just love babies."

Diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder
Duke's life has had many ups and downs. In 1965, at the age of 18, she married Harry Falk, an assistant director on her TV show. He was 32. After the show was cancelled, Patty's severe depression surfaced and included periods of mania, suicide attempts, anorexia, drug abuse and alcoholism. She and Falk were divorced in 1969, and in 1970 she had an affair with married actor John Astin that left her pregnant. Sean Astin (of Lord of the Rings fame) was born in February of 1971.

John Astin eventually divorced his wife, and he and Patty were married in August of 1972, when Sean was 18 months old. John had three sons from his first marriage, and he and Patty had another son, Mackenzie Astin, in 1974. Patty found herself the mother of five boys. Along with the pressure of developing their professional careers, Patty found life to be very emotionally painful and difficult.

In 1982, after she and John Astin had separated, Patty was diagnosed as having bipolar disorder. She said receiving the diagnosis was a huge relief. Today, Patty says that Lithium helps her live a normal life.

Just Kevin's Mom
Patty and Astin divorced in 1985 and in 1986, Patty married Michael Pearce, the man who is truly the love of her life. "I crave an ordinary life," she exclaimed. "For 17 years, Michael and I have lived in Idaho. I fit in well here. Our son goes to school, we have animals to love and Michael is a great husband. First, we lived on a farm and I loved being with all the animals. Now though, we live in a little city and it has been good. Our 17-year-old son, Kevin, has many friends and sometimes it feels like they all live at our house. Sometimes people recognize me on the street, but I am always gracious. Usually I am Kevin's mom and I have a nice relationship with his buddies but every once in a while they notice my Oscar® and they want to know about it." (Patty has also received two Golden Globes®, three Emmy Awards®, six Emmy Nominations and a People's Choice Award.) "It's funny, though," she adds, "because when the conversation about my career and achievements is over, I'm just Kevin's mom again.

"Every morning, when I open my eyes, my wonderful husband brings me a cup of coffee. That's his insurance for a peaceful day. Then there are the household chores, a lot of telephoning and e-mailing on mental health issues, and finally, I will pack for an upcoming trip. These days, I am speaking and traveling a lot; talking about bipolar disorder and mental health issues. For example, in Mental Health month, I can travel to
18 cities in 3 weeks."

Spreading the Message
Duke describes her odyssey in two books, her autobiography, Call Me Anna, published in 1987, and a book on bipolar disorder written with medical reporter Gloria Hochman, A Brilliant Madness: Living With Manic Depressive Illness, in 1993. She also is active in the National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH) and the National Alliance for the Mentally Ill (NAMI) and has launched The Patty Duke Online Center for Mental Wellness.

Anna recently helped launch the Broward Housing Solution's Peace of Mind Giving Society, an opportunity for the community to support Broward Housing Solutions and its mission to provide quality housing opportunities to lower income persons with mental illness in Broward County, Florida. Her keynote address offered a first-hand look at living with mental illness, struggling with bipolar disorder and a candid portrayal of her challenging career.

Anna [Patty Duke] has become a stigma buster. When someone is having a problem with their mental health she tells them to move beyond the fear, get help and most importantly, to take their medicine.

No winter blues for Balance Magazine readers. Just remember, a bend in the road is not the end of the road…it is life's meandering journey bringing you to unknown places that are often recognized as destiny.

Patty's Priorities for Living Well